I know I'm supposed to be like this:
But I'm not. Don't get me wrong, usually I am like this. And not even just on Valentine's day! It's easy to let myself get into some pity party about my singleness. I've only ever had one boyfriend. And that was when I was 17. The world would have me believe I'm some huge freak! But I know better. Here are the three conclusions I've made of late:
1) It's not you, it's me.
So I have this really bad habit. Coloquially, it's called unrequited love. Really, what that means is every time I meet some nice guy, and I find out he's a Christian, maybe we even flirt a little... all of a sudden my brain goes haywire. I start over analyzing everything and striving. Somehow I think it's all up to me whether something might come from the friendship. But honestly, enough is enough. I'm done with thinking it is my job to make someone (anyone, not just guys) like me. I know that who I am is good enough. I also know that God has me in a season of being single. At some point that will change, but I'm not going to keep asking Him, "Is it time yet? Now? Is it time now?" And I guess here is where I'm making the switch to, "It's not me, it's you, God."
2) Romantic love is not the only love, or even the best love.
One of my favorite authors, John Green, who also makes youtube videos with his brother Hank, said this to his brother in one video,
"Both you and I live in worlds that tell us there are only two important things. One is the acquisition of goods and the other is either the acquisition or avoidance of sex. But Hank, it turns out that the question of who's a virgin and who's [not] is not the most interesting question. And the romantic relationships in your life are not the only important relationships."A few months later he made a video on Valentine's day that sums it up pretty well, I think:
"Valentine's Day is perhaps the most potent symbol of our weird obsession with romantic love. Like why isn't 'Best Friends Day' the biggest shopping day of the year? Because for some reason, we think you can only have loving, sustained relationships with someone who you also sleep with.3) Loving God is my top priority.
If you spend your life singularly obsessed with romantic love, you're gonna miss out on a lot of what's fun about being a person... also you're gonna have to spend a lot of money on diamonds."
So my mom and I were channel surfing the other day and we stumbled upon the movie City of Angels. Now, if you don't know what that movie is about, it stars Nicholas Cage as an angel who decides to give up his angelic rights to become a human so that he can love Meg Ryan. I know. Aside from the obvious, what got me was the ending scene. Another angel asks him if it was worth it and he says,
Somehow, we have, as humans, gotten to the point where we believe that one day of "true love" is worth risking everything for (other movies that come to mind that say this too: Titanic, Pearl Harbor). That one day of romantic love is worth more than the love that comes from God, and it is worth leaving Heaven and His presence for.
WHAT?!???
The top rated comments on Youtube for this video are these:
and,
But I would counter these statements with this verse from Romans 5:8, "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.""omg can any one love someone by that way
this is the purest love"
When I was seperated from God, because of my sin, because of the sin we all have as humans, Jesus laid His life down for me. He did it because he loved me!
Soon before he was crucified, Jesus told his disciples, "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. " -John 15:12-13. This is the purest form of love. Not selfish, self-satisfying love, but sacrificial love.
A man asked Jesus what he could do to inherit eternal life. Jesus answered with a question, "What is written in the Law?" Jesus did this a lot. How often do we ask God a question we already know the answer to? The man "answered: 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" -Luke 10:27.
Earlier this month I was at a friend's church. We were walking through the hallway and by the kid rooms was a sign and it said, "Jesus is my Valentine." Maybe it's completely cheesy, but I don't care. I resolved right then and decided: Jesus is my Valentine.
"Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.
I will praise you, O Lord my God, with all my heart; I will glorify your name forever.
For great is your love toward me; you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.
But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness." -Psalm 86:11-13, 15
This is my prayer: that I would love God with my heart, my whole heart. Not part of it, but my entire, undivided heart. And I would love Jesus with all my soul, strength and mind.
And to my friends and family, I LOVE YOU! I love you so very much. And I hope I show you my love for you throughout the year.
